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So Here We Go Again Just Like I Said Iwould for Oyu

Written By quarta-feira, 11 de maio de 2022 Add Comment Edit

Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby is a 2006 film about the #1 NASCAR commuter, who stays atop the heap thanks to a pact with his best friend and teammate. But when a French Formula Ane driver makes his mode up the ladder, his talent and devotion are put to the exam.

Directed by Adam McKay. Written by Adam McKay and Will Ferrell.

Ricky Bobby [edit]

  • [running effectually on the track in his underwear, thinking he is on fire] Help me Jesus! Help me Jewish God! Help me Allah! AAAAAHHH! Help me, Tom Cruise! Tom Cruise, use your witchcraft on me to get the burn down off me!
  • I sent in my application to The Real World, and so I'm hoping to hear dorsum from that. I'm putting a lot of my eggs into that basket, the MTV basket. And if that doesn't work out I'm thinking about getting a gun, and dealin' crack. Existence a crack dealer. Not, similar, a mean crack dealer, but like... like a nice one. Kinda friendly, like, "Hey, what'due south upwards guys? Y'all want some crack?". I'g just kinda waiting on those two things to mankind themselves out.
  • Hey, Jamie! Losing'southward never fun, but here's a little something to pick your spirits up... (flips bird) It's existent squeamish...I got information technology at Target...it was on sale.
  • [driving his first race] Hey, Lucius, I but wanted to share a slice of personal information with you lot. I've got a...a chubby correct now because THIS IS Ane OF THE MOST Awesome EXPERIENCES OF MY LIFE Because I'K GETTIN' TO DRIVE A RACECAR I CAN'T BELIEVE It OH MY GOD!!!
  • [Looking under the hood of his race car] Hot dog! I hateful, that's similar lookin' up Yasmine Bleeth'due south brim!
  • Hey. I'm Ricky Bobby. When you're workin' on your mysterious lady part stuff, you should have the right tools likewise. That's why you should utilize...Maypax. The official tampon of NASCAR.
  • You gotta win to get dearest. I mean, that'due south just life. Look at...look at Don Shula. Legendary coach. Look at that Asian guy who holds the world tape for eatin' all those hot dogs in a row. Look at Rue McClanahan. From The Golden Girls. Three people, all neat champions, all loved.
  • Mr. Dennit, with all due respect, and remember I'm sayin' with all due respect, that idea ain't worth a velvet painting of a whale and a dolphin gettin' it on.

From Ricky and Cal'due south Commercials [edit]

  • [doing a Large Reddish commercial] My friends used to call me Big Red, just I told 'em "Stop it!" 'cause there'south but one Big Cerise in boondocks, America'south number 1 cinnamon gum. What? What did yous say? That's what I thought. DICK

Commercials [edit]

  • I'k Ricky Bobby. If yous don't chew Big Carmine, then fuck y'all.
  • Hi, I'm Ricky Bobby. Christmas is right around the corner, and what improve gift to give a loved one [pulls out knife] than this Jackhawk 9000. Available at Wal-Mart!
  • When yous work on your mysterious lady parts and stuff, you lot demand the right tools too. That's why y'all should apply [is tossed a box of tampons] Maypax. The official tampon of NASCAR.

Cal Naughton, Jr. [edit]

  • I like to motion picture my Jesus in a tuxedo T-shirt. 'Cause information technology says like, I wanna be formal only I'm here to party too. I like to party, and then I like my Jesus to political party.
  • Now, I've got a bulletin for all the other drivers out there. If you lot aroma a delicious, crispy smell after the race, information technology's not your tailpipe. It's simply a little of Shake...and Bake!
  • [subsequently Girard breaks Ricky's arm] Agree on a 2d, Mr. Fancy-Pants Foreigner. You but bankrupt my bro's arm. Now you're 'tour to get tasered. Say hello to Dr. Watts!
  • [to Ricky, in the hospital] There's somethin' I want to get off my breast. It's near that summer, when you went away to community higher. I got an offer to do Playgirl Magazine, and I did it. I did a total spread for Playgirl Magazine. I mean spread, homo, I pulled my butt apart and stuff...I was totally nude...it was weird. I mean, you probably didn't hear about it 'cause I went under the name of Mike Honcho. But I only wanted you to know that. If you can hear me, if it got into your brain somehow...that I spread my buttcheeks every bit Mike Honcho.

From outtakes [edit]

  • I similar to call up of Jesus like a muscular trapeze creative person.
  • I like to recollect of Jesus similar a shapeshifter, or a changeling, like that guy--You ever hear of that Television receiver evidence Manimal?

From deleted scenes [edit]

  • Nosotros go together similar Easter mornin' and Lyme Affliction.
  • Nosotros go together like suits of armor and electrical storms.
  • I'grand merely sayin' we click, you know? We're like skateboardin' and motorway ramps.
  • We become together like pigs and swimmin'.
  • We go together like tuna fish and cigarettes.
  • We go together like campin' trips and head lice.
  • We go together like square dancin' and handguns. Right?
  • Don't make me bring the darkness. [pulls out taser]
  • We go together similar cocaine and waffles.

Reese Bobby [edit]

  • If you own't beginning, you're last!
  • [Getting thrown out of Ricky'due south school] You people are in the wrong on this one! So in the wrong! This is egregious! You lot hear me? Egregious!
  • I saw what happened to you in that race. You saw the fear. You need to learn to drive with the fear, and at that place ain't nothin' more goddamn frightening than driving with a live cougar in the car.
  • Hey, close the door and come in. I got weed in here, cowboy.
  • [to Ricky who is delivering pizza on a bicycle] Hey, is that a Huffy? That's a nice-lookin' wheel, boy!
  • Hell, Ricky, I was high when I said that! That makes no sense at all! "First or last"! I mean, yous could be second, third, fourth--hell, you could even be 5th!

Walker Bobby [edit]

  • Daddy, you made that grace your bowwow.
  • I like to think of Jesus like a ninja, fightin' off evil samurai.
  • [as Ricky attempts to pass Girard in a race] Send that weird man dorsum to Indonesia!
  • You're gonna break us like wild horses, ain't you?
  • shut up, scrap, or I'll become ape-shit on your donkey!

From unrated version [edit]

  • Greatest generation my donkey, Tom Brokaw is a punk!

Texas Ranger Bobby [edit]

  • Grandfather, tin can't we resolve this conflict without anger?
  • [Shouting at a neighbor's house] Close those mutts up earlier I cook 'em and consume 'em!
  • What y'all lookin' at, Popeye?
  • Chip, I'm gonna come at y'all similar a spider monkey!
  • Fleck, I'g all jacked up on Mountain Dew!
  • One'a you turds is virtually to get smacked in the rima oris!
  • [throwing away their junk] Aw, Nana, not my prison shank.

From deleted scenes [edit]

  • You look old, Granny, are you gonna die today?
  • [eating at Applebee's] It'southward Applebee-riffic!

Glenn [edit]

  • [well-nigh being a pit crew member] Sorry, Lucius, only it's a hard habit to break, like stalking an ex-girlfriend.
  • Peaches and foam!
  • Ricky, this car is similar your Excalibur, the mighty sword King Arthur used to join the knights of the roundtable, until Lancelot betrayed him by laying with his queen [whispering] in the biblical sense.

Lucius Washington [edit]

  • [After Ricky has stabbed himself in the leg] Hither, we'll employ this pocketknife to pry the other ane out!
  • [As Ricky races for the first time] Only remember this, Ricky: you wreck that car, that'south $200,000 out of your pocket!
  • Glenn, shut up.

From outtakes [edit]

  • Sometimes, when it's late at night, I apparel up like Donna Summers. I put on the skirt, and the four inch heels...I love it. [singing] Last chance, for romance, for love.....

Others [edit]

  • Carley Bobby: [about Walker and Texas Ranger] If we wanted u.s. some wussies, we would have named them 'Dr. Quinn' and 'Medicine Adult female', okay?
  • Carley, Cal, Walker, Texas Ranger: Jenga!
  • Announcer at Racetrack: [later Girard completes a successful lap] Ladies and gentlemen, that is a new track record. As information technology stands now, Jean Girard is sitting on the pole - which is, of grade, a argument of fact and in no way a annotate on the commuter'southward sexual orientation.
  • Bill Weber: Nosotros'd like to give thanks you lot for joining us for NBC'due south coverage of NASCAR. Coming up next, it's "Water ice Dancing To The Hits Of Motown"!
  • Bill Weber: Ricky Bobby wins! Yous'll never encounter anything like that in a hundred lifetimes! Information technology was completely illegal and in no way volition count, but, man, that was something!
  • Hershell: [about the jazz music] I want this music out of my head!
  • Kyle: [well-nigh the jazz music] Sounds like someone fabricated a tape of somethin' dying or something!
  • Opening title card: America is all nigh speed. Hot, nasty, bad-ass speed. - Eleanor Roosevelt, 1936.

From deleted scenes [edit]

  • Fleck: Every bit Thor said to Loki, "When you scroll the die, you pay the price."

Dialogue [edit]

Reese Bobby: [walks into the classroom] Excuse me, darlin'. I'thousand Reese Bobby. I'grand here for career twenty-four hours.
10-year-quondam Ricky Bobby: Hey dad.
Reese Bobby: Hey there, boy! Man, yous got big. How long's information technology been? Three, 4 months?
10-twelvemonth-old Ricky Bobby: Ten years.
Reese Bobby: Ten years? Human! I gotta lay off the peyote. [puts a cigarette in his mouth]
Ricky's teacher: Mr. Bobby, there'due south no smoking in here.
Reese Bobby: Oh, it'due south all correct, darlin'. I'm a volunteer fire-eater. Okay, I am a semi-professional person racecar driver and an amateur tattoo artist. [Children makes "oohs" and "aahs"] And the first thing you gotta larn if you're gonna be a racecar driver, is you lot don't listen to losers similar your know-it-all teacher.
Ricky'south teacher: Okay, I think that'due south enough...
Reese Bobby: Run across, the teacher wants you to get tedious, but she'south wrong, 'crusade it'due south the fastest who gets paid and it's the fastest who gets laid. [Children cheer; Reese nods] Aw, yeah.
[Cutting to Reese beingness thrown out by a group of janitors; Ricky's grade follows them]
Reese Bobby: You lot people are in the incorrect on this one! Then in the wrong! This is egregious! You hear me? Egregious! [Points at a janitor] We were cellmates together, Andy! You lot got payback comin'! [To Ricky] Don't listen to these people, Ricky! You're a winner! If you own't first, you're last!
[Reese jumps in his #13 Chevelle and speeds away; the children all cheer again.]
10 year old Ricky Bobby: If y'all own't commencement, you're last...
Jean Girard: [After breaking Ricky's arm] Your injury is one of ignorance and pride. Au revoir!
Cal: Now you merely agree it right there Mr. Fancypants Foreigner, you just broke my bro's arm, now you're nigh to get tasered. [Takes out a taser; Jean grabs a pool stick and prepares to fight] Say hello to Dr. Watts!
Ricky Bobby: Go him Cal.
[Early in their careers, Cal and Ricky are pit crewmen; their driver quits during the race]
Glen: Information technology's not ever bad to be in last place. Here's some things we can focus on: Ane, we tried hard. And two, we're however dearest friends!
Lucius Washington: Glenn, shut up. Mind, if we don't get that machine dorsum on the runway, our sponsors are gonna shit a craven. Now, is there anyone out in that location who wants to get fast?
Ricky Bobby: [raising his manus] I wanna become fast!
Ricky Bobby: How was school today, boys?
Walker Bobby: I threw a bunch of Grandpa Bit'south state of war medals off the bridge. [Flake is startled]
Ricky Bobby: Sounds like a proficient twenty-four hours. How 'tour you lot, TR?
Texas Ranger Bobby: Well, the teacher asked me what was the capitol of Due north Carolina. I said Washington D.C.
Cal Naughton, Jr.: Bingo!
Ricky Bobby: Dainty.
Texas Ranger Bobby: And she said 'No, you lot're wrong.' I said 'You got a lumpy butt!' She got mad at me and yelled at me, and I pissed in my pants. And I never did change my pee pants all day, I'm still sittin' in my dingy pee pants.
Cal Naughton, Jr.: I moisture my bed until I was nineteen. There'due south no shame in that.
[During the victory commemoration after a race where Ricky beats Jamie McMurray by driving in reverse]
Lucius Washington: I don't wanna rain on your parade, but that was some of the dumbest driving I have e'er seen in my life.
Ricky Bobby: Cheers.
Lucius Washington: Now, I know you won the race, but you're not gonna live forever.
Ricky Bobby: Oh, I'm not stupid, Lucius. No one lives forever. No one. But with advances in modern science, and my high level of income, I hateful, information technology's non crazy to recall I can't live to be 245, maybe 300. Heck, I just read in the newspaper that they put a pig heart in some guy from Russia. Practise you lot know what that means?
Lucius Washington: No, I don't know what that means. I guess, uh, longer life.
Ricky Bobby: Well, no, he didn't live.
Lucius Washington: Oh, he didn't live?
Ricky Bobby: I mean, it's just exciting that we're tryin' things like that.
Ricky Bobby: Love Eight Pound, Six Ounce, Newborn Baby Jesus, in your aureate, fleece diapers, with your curled-up, fat, balled-upwardly little fists pawin' at the air...
Chip: He was a homo! He had a beard!
Ricky Bobby: I like the infant version the all-time, do you hear me?! I win the races and I get the money! I piece of work too hard for your bull, Chip.
Chip: I can't hold my tongue. These kids are my grandchildren and you are raising them wrong. They are terrible boys!
Walker: Shut up, Chip, or I'll go ape-shit on your ass!
Texas Ranger: I'm gonna scissor-kick you in the back of the caput!
Cal: Yeah!
Ricky: Yes! Turn upwardly the oestrus!
Cal: Continue and get some, boys!
Ricky: Come on!
Walker: I'chiliad ten years sometime, simply I'll crush your ass!
Texas Ranger: Chip, I'm gonna come up at you like a spider monkey!
Ricky: Chip, you brought this on, human.
Chip: What is incorrect with you lot?!
Texas Ranger: Chip, I'm all jacked upward on Mountain Dew!
[Ricky is passed out on the porch; Reese arouses him by throwing a bucket of h2o on him]
Reese Bobby: Where'd stock-machine racing come up from?
Ricky Bobby: What? [He gets doused once more] Hey, stop doing that!"
Reese Bobby: How'd stock-auto racing go its start?
Ricky Bobby: Uh, bootleggers in Prohibition, they had to take cars fast enough to outrun the fed, then they started racing each other!
Reese Bobby: [afterward a moment] That'due south right. [throws another saucepan on Ricky]
Ricky Bobby: If I was correct, why'd you throw another bucket on me?!
Reese Bobby: Well I filled up three. Now, at that place'southward nothing like driving to avert jail. Aught hones your mind and your instincts like necessity. So I taped a kilo of cocaine underneath the car and called the boys in blue. Now, the way I effigy information technology, you got nigh two minutes earlier they show up, and you do five to ten. So, what's it gonna be? Fear...or prison? [Ricky looks at Reese, confused; sirens can be heard in the background]
Ricky Bobby: What the hell are you talkin' about?!
Reese Bobby: Real simple, son: Cops are comin'! There's a kilo of Colombian bam-bam underneath the car! Time to be a human! Yous got hair on your peaches or what?
Jean: Hello, uh, "Reecky Booby". What happened concluding calendar week was very regrettable and unfortunate, and...every bit a gesture, I would like to, um...sign your bandage, please.
Ricky: Aw, hell, y'all know what, get my machine off the trailer, guys.
Carley: Babe! That's my infant!
Lucius: Whoa, hold on, Ricky, Ricky, Ricky, what are you lot talking nigh?
Ricky: Look, I wanna bulldoze, okay? My arm's fine, so, look, go the machine off the trailer! Don't look at me, become information technology off the trailer!
Carley: Go!
Larry Dennit: Come on, Ricky, even with a salubrious arm, you don't have a risk against Jean Girard.
Lucius: Alright, fellas, you lot heard the human, go the automobile off the trailer.
[Girard steps over the railing and gets in Ricky'south face]
Ricky: What'southward going on?
Jean: Soon you lot volition know what it is similar to be defeated by the hands of someone who is truly amend than you. As William Blake wrote, "The cutting worm forgives the plow."
Ricky: Well, let me just quote the late, slap-up, Colonel Sanders. He said, "I'm too drunk to taste this chicken."
Jean: What has that got to do with this?
Cal: I got a message for all of them, fix? Shake...and Bake!
Ricky: What does that practise, does that blow your mind? That just happened!
Jean: What is that, is that a catchphrase or is it, uh, epilepsy?
Cal: [whispering] Milkshake and Bake!
Jean: What?
Cal: [whispering] Shake and Bake!
Jean: Listen, you improve...be conscientious, because tomorrow you lot're going to go beaten. Browbeaten real bad, cowboy!
Ricky: Really?
Jean: Yes! And I wanna know--
Ricky: That's news to me!
Jean: I said I wanna know--
Jean: Tomorrow you lot are going to get browbeaten--
Ricky: I'll rip you a new i!
Jean: There'south going to be a croissant that I'm going to take away--
Ricky: I-I play for keeps! I play for keeps!
Jean: I give you one option, Monsieur "Booby". As a sign of humility, if you lot kiss me on the lips now, I volition return to Paris and you will never run across me again in NASCAR. I shut my--
Ricky: The answer is never! Do you hear me?
Jean: I close my--
Ricky: Never ever!
Jean: Well, yes or no?
Ricky: That's sick!
[Girard rubs his nose confronting Ricky's]
Cal: [whispers in Girard'south ear] Milk shake and Bake!
Ricky: Yeah!
Jean: What is that? It makes no sense! All this "Milk shake and Bake", it's nonsense!
Carley: Hey, baby, y'all're so smooth.
Ricky: Thanks, Carley. Cal, you lot could say that 10,000 times, and it still wouldn't be enough.
Cal: It fires me up, man.
Ricky: I love it, say information technology one more time.
Cal: Shake and Bake!
Carley: Woo!
Ricky: Doesn't that feel good?
Cal: Yeah! It rhymes, they're both verbs...information technology'southward awesome!
Walker: Chaos! Chaos! Anarchy! Anarchy!
Texas Ranger: I don't even know what that means, but I dear information technology!
Walker: Shut upward in here, I'm tryin' to sleep!
Texas Ranger: One of y'all turds is nigh to get smacked in the mouth!
Ricky Bobby: [afterwards Reese offers to assist him go fast again] Fine. I'll do it. But I ain't callin' yous Daddy.
Reese Bobby: Well, what are you gonna call me then?
[Cuts to Ricky and Reese standing by Reese's automobile]
Ricky Bobby: All right, Professor Dickweed, what'southward the plan?
Cal: Hey, when you accept the stereo and the T.V. on at the same time, how practice you command the volume on the T.V.?
Ricky: Why would you lot take the stereo and the T.V. on at the same time?
Cal: 'Cause I like to party.
Lucius Washington: Now, Ricky, the medico told us that we should permit yous work it out on your ain sweet time, but...Ricky, yous tin can walk.
Ricky Bobby: What'd yous just say?
Cal Naughton, Jr.: He'due south tellin' you the truth, man. It's all in your head.
Ricky: You sick...sons of bitches! I mean, you walk in that door, on your two legs, all fat and cocky, and lookin' at me in my chair, and you tell me information technology's all in my head? I hope that both of you lot accept sons! Handsome, beautiful, articulate sons, who are talented, and star athletes, and they have their legs taken abroad! I mean, I pray you know that hurting and that injure!
Lucius: Don't you put that evil on me, Ricky Bobby!!! Don't you put that on us! You are Not paralyzed!
Ricky: I am SO paralyzed!
Lucius: NO, NO, NO!
Cal: Don't exist rough on him, at present.
Lucius: No, he needs to know!
Cal: Okay.
Lucius: He's always cryin'!
Cal: Alright, tough honey it is, tough honey. [to Ricky] Wake up, idiot!
Ricky: [pulls out a knife] Yous wanna know what I am?! Y'all wanna see what my life is?!
Lucius: Don't do information technology!
Ricky: You wanna meet what'due south goin' on hither?!
Cal: Don't you lot stick that knife in your leg...
[Ricky does so, pauses for a moment, and and then screams]
Flake: Ricky, remember: The fieldmouse is fast, simply the owl sees at night. [maniacal laughter]
Cal Naughton, Jr.: That'southward kinda creepy, ain't it?
Dick Berggren: Dick Berggren reporting from Las Vegas victory lane for Fox Television. Ricky, manifestly a huge win for yous today, but it seems as if you either win, or crash the machine trying to win.
Ricky Bobby: Well, Dick, here's the deal: I'thousand the best there is - plain and simple. I mean, I wake upward in the morning and I piss excellence. You know, nobody can hang with my stuff. I'm just a--simply a big, hairy, American winning machine. "If y'all ain't commencement, you lot're final!" You know? You know what I mean? That phrase is trademarked and not to exist used without the expressed permission of Ricky Bobby, Inc.
[During the Lowe's Motor Speedway race]
Mike Joy: Ricky Bobby, who never met a sponsor he wouldn't push, has a huge Fig Newtons sticker on his windshield!
Darrell Waltrip: I think NASCAR'll blackness-flag him for that!
Mike Joy: He sold the windshield!
Ricky Bobby: This sticker is dangerous and inconvenient, simply I do honey Fig Newtons.
[Subsequently Ricky takes off in Reese's car, the police hot on his tail]
Walker: Grandfather, how nearly you accept us fishin' and tell us life lessons, and stories about your childhood?
Reese Bobby: I got a amend idea. How 'bout you boys go effectually back and dig a hole, and I'll go get another beer?
Texas Ranger: Someone didn't love you plenty when you were fiddling, did they?
Reese Bobby': That'south a expert phone call. [he easily Texas Ranger his beer] Here, that'south worth a nickel.
Texas Ranger: Tragic.
[Ricky is walking with Girard]
Ricky: Belongings hands with a man makes me terribly uncomfortable.
Jean: It is a sign of friendship in many countries.
Ricky: Yep, well, not in ours.
Jean: There is nothing sexual well-nigh it. Delight don't be worried by the fact that I have an erection right now, information technology has naught to do with you.
Ricky: [pulls hand away, disgusted] Hey, come on! Look, hither's the deal: I came here to tell you one thing, alright? Tomorrow, I'grand comin' for y'all.
Jean: Do y'all know why I came to America, "Reecky Booby"?
Ricky: Public schools, health care systems, giant water parks, I mean, the same reason anyone comes to America.
Jean: I came here for you to shell me.
Ricky: What the hell are you lot talkin' virtually?
Jean: My married man Gregory and I wish for only that which every other couple wishes for: to retire to Stockholm and design a currency for dogs and cats to utilise. Merely before I can do that...
Ricky: That'south dumb.
Jean: It'south not dumb!
Ricky: That's but dumb.
Jean: Why is information technology dumb?
Ricky: I don't know.
Jean: But earlier I can do that, I must exist defeated by a commuter who'due south truly meliorate than me.
Ricky: Then you're gonna lose to me on purpose?
Jean: No.
Ricky: No?
Jean: NO! I volition boxing you with the entirety of my heart, and you will probably lose, but maybe, juuuust maybe, you might claiming me. God needs the Devil. The Beatles needed The Rolling Stones. Even Diane Sawyer needed Katie Couric. Volition you be my...Katie Couric?
Ricky: Wow. [chuckles] I feel similar I'm in Highlander.

[they both laugh]

Jean: What is the Highlander?
Ricky: It's a movie.
Jean: Whatsoever good?
Ricky: Very adept. It won the University Honour.
Jean: Oh? For what?
Ricky: For all-time moving-picture show ever made. Just want you to know, I came here today to tell you 1 matter: Come race time tomorrow, I'grand comin' for yous, all right?
Jean: May God be with you.
Ricky: Yeah.
Jean: Because although today I am friendly...tomorrow...will exist WAR!
Ricky: All right...
Susan: [telling Ricky why he should get back into racing] It's because it's what you love to do. It's who you lot were built-in to be. And here y'all sit--thinking! Well, Ricky Bobby is not a thinker. Ricky Bobby is a driver. He is a doer, and that's what you need to do. You don't need to call up. You need to drive. Y'all need speed. You need to go out there, and you lot demand to rev your engine. You lot demand to fire information technology up. You lot need to grab a hold of that line betwixt speed and chaos, and y'all need to wrestle information technology to the ground like a demon cobra. And and so, when the fear rises up in your belly, you lot employ information technology. And you know that fear is powerful, considering information technology has been there for billions of years! And information technology is good! And you use it! And you ride it; you ride it like a skeleton equus caballus through the gates of hell, and and so you win, Ricky! You WIN! And you don't win for anybody else. You win for you, y'all know why? Because a man takes what he wants. He takes it all. And you're a homo, aren't you? Aren't you?!
Ricky: Susan, I've never heard you talk like that... Are nosotros almost to become it on? Considering I'm as hard equally a diamond in an ice storm right now.
Susan: Hullo, I'm his lady, I'm Susan. I painted the car, I...nosotros had sex.
Reese Bobby: You did?
Susan & Ricky Bobby: Yeah.
Reese Bobby: Well, I wish I coulda been there for that.
Jean Girard: Eh, everybody, this is my 'usband, Gregory. [Everyone gasps, and someone drops their beer]
Gregory: [waves] See you lot at the track!
Cal: Did he just say "married man"?
Herschell: Sugariness Lord! Dennit hired a gay Frenchman as your teammate!
Ricky Bobby: The room'due south startin' to spin existent fast... cause of... cause of the gayness. Cal, I beloved you. [Ricky faints]
Cal Naughton, Jr.: Ricky? Ricky! Oh, God!
[The scene fades to black, then cuts to the middle of a SPEED Channel broadcast]
Bob Jenkins: ...But yous know fans of NASCAR; the drivers; everybody is talking about this new driver Jean Girard. Let'south find out a piddling more than about him from our reporter Davey Wesling.
Davey Wesling: Talented. Eccentric. Dominating. These are the words that define Jean Girard. [clips of Girard tending to his horses are shown] Before each race, Jean Girard spends time with his world-class horses, who are besides gay. [changes to clips of Girard with Gregory] Jean'southward days are filled with dominicus-drenched walks with his beloved married man Gregory. [cuts to Gregory preparation vi German Shepherds to balance on each other] Though Gregory is no stay-at-home spouse: He's a globe-class trainer of German Shepherds! Only time will tell if Jean'south foray into NASCAR will finish upwards in victory lane. [The SPEED anchors are dumbstruck]
Texas Ranger Bobby: [complaining about doing community service while picking upward trash on the side of the highway] I gotta tell ya Granny, this blows!
Walker Bobby: How much more of this?
Lucy Bobby: Well I don't know. When are yous boys going to end tossing me the radio in the bathtub?
Ricky Bobby: Dear Tiny, Infant, Jesus...
Carley Bobby: Hey, um, sweetie...Jesus did abound up. You don't always have to call him infant. It's a bit odd and off-puttin' to pray to a baby.
Ricky Bobby: Look, I like the Christmas Jesus best, and I'm sayin' grace. When you lot say grace, you lot can say information technology to Grownup Jesus or Teenage Jesus or Bearded Jesus or whoever you want.
[Ricky is trying to become back upwards to the rails]
Ricky Bobby: I'm really gonna open up information technology up now! Woooo! I missed y'all, Mama Speed! Ricky Bobby'south dorsum!
Larry Dennit, Jr.: Wait, h--how fast is he going?
Lucius Washington: Uh, 26 miles an hour. [Cuts to Ricky'southward machine limping down the inside lane as anybody else zips by on the outside]
Ricky Bobby: What were those things? Were those the other cars?!
Cal Naughton, Jr.: [equally Ricky climbs into the racecar for the commencement time] Hey, man! Call up when nosotros got kicked out of biology for playing with Matchbox cars?!
Ricky Bobby: Aye!
Cal Naughton, Jr.: Who's retarded now?!
Ricky Bobby: Aye!
Cal Naughton, Jr.: Hey, what are you doin' subsequently this?
Ricky Bobby: Afterward the race?
Cal Naughton, Jr.: Yes!
Ricky Bobby: I don't know, only it feels like we're wastin' a lot of time!
Cal Naughton, Jr.: Aw, I know! I'm just excited! Hey! I love you!
Ricky Bobby: What?
Cal Naughton, Jr.: Nothin'! [Ricky and Cal bump fists] Go some! Yous're my best friend! Yous're my all-time friend!
Ricky Bobby: I know! I gotta get goin'! [Cal secures the window netting and Ricky drives out]
Reese: Look, all I got to my name is a car, and a duffel pocketbook total of underwear and sweet, stinky weed.
Walker: How much you sellin' that weed for, old human being?
Susan: How does one get thrown out of an Applebee'south?
Ricky Bobby: You lot're near to find out.
Mr. Dennit: Ricky, your little obscene gesture is going to cost you lot 100 points. Do you know how much that costs u.s. in sponsorship dollars?
Ricky: With all due respect, Mr. Dennit, I had no thought you'd gotten experimental surgery to accept your balls removed.
Mr. Dennit: What did you just say to me?
Ricky: What? I said information technology with all due respect!
Mr. Dennit: Just because you say that doesn't hateful you get to say whatever you want to say to me!
Ricky: It sure as hell does!
Mr. Dennit: No, it doesn't--
Ricky: It's in the Geneva Conventions, look it up!
Ricky Bobby: What practice you care near me, or us- I mean, hell, you never even met your grandkids!
[Reese looks confused for a moment, squinting at Walker and Texas Ranger]
Texas Ranger: What are y'all lookin at, Popeye?
Reese Bobby: Y'all shut up, yous little potlicker, I'll put you in a microwave. At present, you bear witness me the Deoxyribonucleic acid tests, and maybe I'll say hello to these little swamp rats.
Frank: [Yelling across the street] Will you people shut the hell up?! I got a married woman in an oxygen tent; nosotros're tryin' to sleep!
Reese Bobby: Yous better shut upward, Frank, or I'll come over there and rip a hole in that tent!
Lucy Bobby: Yes, shut upwards, Frank!
Walker: Go shave your balls, you dusty one-time fart!
Reese Bobby: [Impressed] Okay. Approximate they are my grandkids.
Cal Naughton, Jr.: [talking to his crew primary over the radio] Hey, Jarvis?
Jarvis: Yep, Cal?
Cal Naughton, Jr.: If you slept with your best friend's wife, why would he apologize to you?
Jarvis: Yes, I don't know, Cal. That's weird.
Cal Naughton, Jr.: That's what I'thou sayin'! My caput's all tied up like...a pretzel! I got a pretzel in my head!
[During Ricky'southward comeback race, Ricky is passing to Cal's within - though Cal cannot see him because of the window cyberspace]
Jarvis: Cal, yous should probably pay attending. I think he'south passing y'all.
Cal Naughton, Jr.: Is Ricky passing me in my subconscious?
Jarvis: No, he's actually passin' you! That's happenin' right now!
Pecker Weber: Ricky Bobby in the #62 car is on the movement. He'south sliding from 26th identify to 18th place. Now permit's go to John Hannafin, who's in the stands with a country music legend. [Cuts to Hannafin in the stands]
John Hannafin: Cheers, Sean. I'm here with one of the greatest country music stars of best, Kenny Rogers. Kenny, what do y'all think of the race then far?
Kenny Rogers: [obviously not Kenny Rogers] It'due south slap-up. They're going really fast.
Nib Weber: John, that'south non Kenny Rogers.
John Hannafin: In the vocal "The Gambler", yous sang "You gotta know when to walk abroad and know when to run." Should Ricky Bobby take stayed away from racing?
"Kenny Rogers": Mr. Bobby'southward very competitive. If he wants to race, he should race.
John Hannafin: Well, this is John Hannafin with Kenny Rogers. And now back to you, Pecker.
Bill Weber: Well, that, of course, was not Kenny Rogers.
Benny Parsons: Not even shut!
Cal: Shake and Bake?
Ricky: No. Never again.
Cal: Y'all're right. I was a total dick, homo.
Ricky: From now on, [points to Cal] information technology'southward Magic Man...[points to himself] and El Diablo.
Cal: Wh--What'south Diablo hateful?
Ricky: It's, like, Spanish for, like, a fighting chicken.
Cal: That's awesome! With the claws?
Ricky: Aye, with the claws. With the claws and a beak!
Cal: How'd y'all come up up with that, homo?
Ricky: Just--sometimes, things click.
Jean: Monsieur "Booby", by defeating me today, you take set me costless. And for that, I cheers. [He offers his hand to Ricky]
Ricky: [shoving Girard's hand away] I volition never milk shake your mitt. Ever. But I will requite you this...[he passionately kisses Girard]
Jean: Sir...you taste...of America.
Ricky: Thank you. [Girard leans in for another osculation] Noooo...in one case was good. Once was good.
Texas Ranger: Well, if information technology isn't our onetime mangy, transient grandad.
Reese Bobby: Well said, grandson. I'll take that every bit a compliment.

From outtakes [edit]

Ricky: Hello, I'm Ricky Bobby.
Cal: And I'm Cal Naughton, Jr.
Ricky: We're here to tell yous well-nigh snow blindness in cats. It'due south affecting more than and more cats each year, and it scares the livin' shit out of us.

From trailer [edit]

Reese: [as Ricky is attacked past a cougar] Ricky, command your heart rate!
Ricky: I tin't command my centre charge per unit, I got a cougar on me!
Ricky: Y'all can't have two number ones.
Cal: Aye... you tin can't, that makes xi.

From deleted scenes [edit]

Jean: Do y'all know why I came to America, "Reecky Booby"?
Ricky: To have a chalupa and marvel at the wisdom of George W. Bush; I mean, the same reason anyone comes to America.
[Deleted scene; Ricky's returned to the garage and is seen interacting with other drivers]
Ricky Bobby: Hey, Greg.
Greg Biffle: Hey, Ricky. Adept to come across you back!
Ricky Bobby: Thank you, bud.
Greg Biffle: Yous're non gonna be running around on pit route in your underwear over again, are ya? Like Charlotte?
Ricky Bobby: You know what? That hurts, human being.
Greg Biffle: Practiced to encounter you back.
Ricky Bobby: Thanks.
[Ricky side by side ends upward in Dale Earnhardt, Jr.'s stall]
Dale Earnhardt, Jr.: Hey, Ricky Bobby. Skilful to see you once more.
Ricky Bobby: Thanks man.
Dale Earnhardt, Jr.: Y'all nonetheless owe me that thirty bucks.
Ricky Bobby: Oh, no, man. You said that was a gift.
Dale Earnhardt, Jr.: You're a muddy liar!
[Ricky adjacent appears in Casey Mears's stall]
Ricky Bobby: Hey, Casey.
Casey Mears: Hey, Ricky.
Ricky Bobby: Hey, man.
Casey Mears: I'thou gonna wreck y'all today. Just kidding.
Ricky Bobby: [laughs] That's a proficient one.
Casey Mears: Proficient to see you lot back.

From unrated version [edit]

[The unrated version of Girard's introduction]
Jean Girard: Why did you stop ze jazz music? Was it unpleasant to you?
Ricky Bobby: No ane plays jazz here at The Pit Stop!
Jean Girard: So then why is the song on the jukebox?
Bartender: We keep information technology on there for profiling purposes. We also got the Pet Store Boys and Seal. [Girard advances on Ricky]
Jean Girard: My name is Jean Girard, and I am a racing-car driver, just like you, except I am from Formula Un. I am the greatest one in the whole world. I have been following your career with not bad interest, Monsieur "Booby".
Ricky Bobby: I can't empathise a word you've said the whole fourth dimension.
Cal Naughton, Jr.: Did y'all eat some peanut butter or something?
Ricky Bobby: Yep, yous sound like a dog with peanut butter on the roof of your mouth.
Jean Girard: I think what you lot are 'earing is my accent. I am, uh...French.
Ricky Bobby: You say y'all're French?
Jean Girard: Oui. [This comes out sounding similar "we"]
Ricky Bobby: "We?" No, nosotros are non French. We're American, because you're in America, okay? Greatest state on the planet.
Jean Girard: Well, what have you given the world apart from, uh, George Bush, Cheerios, and the Thighmaster?
Ricky Bobby: Chinese food?
Cal Naughton, Jr.: Chinese nutrient.
Jean Girard: That's from People's republic of china.
Ricky Bobby: Pizza.
Jean Girard: Italy.
Cal Naughton, Jr.: Chimichanga.
Jean Girard: Mexican.
Ricky Bobby: Actually, smarty-pants? What did French state requite us?
Jean Girard: We invented republic, existentialism... and the blowjob.
Cal Naughton, Jr.: Those are three pretty good things.
Ricky Bobby: Hey.
Cal Naughton, Jr.: Hey, that last ane's pretty cool.
Jean Girard: And ze soixante-neuf. Y'all know, the 69? With the head almost the...[jerks head to the correct] that scrap? We came up with it.
Herschell: Nosotros created the missionary position. Y'all're welcome.
Jean Girard: "Reecky Booby", I have come 'ere to defeat yous.
Ricky Bobby: Oh, well, there's strikes two and three right at that place! [Ricky and Cal laugh] Well, welcome to America, amigo! [He swings at Girard, but Girard slaps him twice, and forces him onto the billiard tabular array, holding his hand in an arm lock]
Jean Girard: You are fast, "Reecky Booby"...but I am faster.
Ricky Bobby: You let get of me, y'all Formula 1 jazz nutjob!
Jean Girard: Like the frightened infant chipmunk, you are scared by annihilation that is different. I will let you become, Ricky. Simply first, I want yous to say..."I... beloved... crepes."
Cal Naughton, Jr.: Don't you say information technology, Ricky. These colors don't run.
Ricky Bobby: I'g not gonna say it.
Cal Naughton, Jr.: Practiced.
Ricky Bobby: Hey, wait, Frenchy, I thought well-nigh it. And then why don't y'all go alee and suspension my arm?
Jean Girard: I exercise not desire to break your arm, Monsieur Bobby, only I am a human being of my word.
Ricky Bobby: Here's the bargain. He'due south not gonna suspension information technology because I'm gonna slip out of information technology right at present. Houdini! [He makes a futile attempt to rescue his arm]
Jean Girard: Whoa! Get down, yous little pancake.
Ricky Bobby: Someone might as well become me a beer while I'k down here.
Jean Girard: Merely yous have forced me to do this. You are now mocking me and making me await ridiculous. Just say, "I dear crepes."
Cal Naughton, Jr.: Y'all know, just to put this in there...I had a whole mess of crepes this mornin'. They're merely similar pancakes, maybe fifty-fifty better.
Ricky Bobby: Wait, are they the really thin pancakes?
Cal Naughton, Jr.: Yeah.
Jean Girard: Yes they are. They are the really thin pancakes. Information technology'due south merely a French word for them.
Ricky Bobby: Oh, my god, I love those!
Cal Naughton, Jr.: Put all the kinds of syrup you want on them. I'1000 just sayin', think about it.
Ricky Bobby: They come with cheese sometimes?
Jean Girard: Yes, of form, a fromage-crepe.
Ricky Bobby: Well, why didn't someone yell that right--correct away?
Jean Girard: Do you know what'due south in the crepe suzette?
Ricky Bobby: Oh, I dearest the crepe suzette.
Jean Girard: With the sugar and lemon juice...
Ricky Bobby: Yeah, the sugar and the lemon juice. Sure.
Jean Girard: Grand Marnier.
Ricky Bobby: I wo - I wish I could crawl into one of those right now. I'd eat my way out from the inside!
Jean Girard: They are tasty.
Kyle: Either way this goes downwards, can nosotros go go some after nosotros're done?
Ricky Bobby: Admittedly, nosotros're gonna do it.
Jean Girard: Bon. So, what if you just said: "I love actually thin pancakes"? That is a fair compromise, no?
Kyle: That is a fair compromise.
Herschell: Very off-white, actually.
Ricky Bobby: No! Considering and then anybody would know I really meant crêpes!
Kyle: That's actually a pretty good compromise right at that place.
Jean Girard: Why do you want me to break your arm and so badly?
Ricky Bobby: Yous don't understand. You don't sympathize because you don't understand liberty. Yous don't empathize freedom. So you put a cleft in my arm like the crack in the Freedom Bell! You hear me?
Cal Naughton, Jr.: [leans downwardly to talk to Ricky in a depression vox] Hey. This is simply between yous and me, okay? I hateful, forget all these other guys. But...he did give you a pretty decent out. Only it'south your call.
Ricky Bobby: [whispering] What do you think?
Cal Naughton, Jr.: Don't say it.
Ricky Bobby: Aye. I'chiliad not gonna say information technology. Nope. Intermission it, Pepé Le Pew!
Jean Girard: As you wish.
[He breaks Ricky's arm]
Ricky Bobby: He actually did it!
Kyle: Back off!
Ricky Bobby: I didn't say it!
Cal Naughton, Jr.: No, you did not!
Jean Girard: Your injury is 1 of ignorance and pride! Au revoir!
[One of Ricky's commercials]
Ricky Bobby: This is Ricky Bobby.
Cal Naughton, Jr.: And I'grand Cal Naughton, Jr.
Ricky Bobby: Urging y'all never to travel to Tijuana.
Ricky: Hey. I lost my license. That's why I'm on the autobus. I'm delivering pizzas.
Man on bus: Motherfucker, what makes yous think I care?! Shut the fuck up!
Ricky: I was just telling 'cause-- Like I said, I lost my license. I've been having a lot of issues lately.
Man on bus: Problems? I don't wanna hear near your damn bug. Everybody got problems! My mama got issues. She just lost her leg. My cousin Pookie just lost a testicle. My dog but threw up somebody's finger! That's a trouble!
Ricky: I actually regret opening my rima oris and talking to you.
Ricky: I go emotional. You guys are workin' so hard, and I'm just then proud of you. You remind me of me, precocious and total of wonderment.
Cal: I tell you what, Ricky, y'all are truly blessed. These two are two in a million, just like Carley's ta-tas. You won't notice another rack like that, I guarantee it.
Carley: Thank you, Cal.
Walker: That's real sweet of y'all, Cal.
Ricky: Cal, that's a real nice sentiment. That'southward almost one of the nicest things you lot always said.
Cal: Well, I mean it.
Carley: End it, gonna make me cry.
Cal: It comes from the heart.

Taglines [edit]

  • The story of a man who could only count to #1.
  • No One Can Handle The Curves, The Speed, The Heat, Like Ricky Bobby.
  • You lot don't have to be quick to be fast.
  • If yous own't outset, you're last!

Cast [edit]

  • Volition Ferrell - Ricky Bobby
  • Gary Cole - Reese Bobby
  • John C. Reilly - Cal Naughton, Jr.
  • Sacha Businesswoman Cohen - Jean Girard
  • Michael Clarke Duncan - Lucius Washington
  • Jane Lynch - Lucy Bobby
  • Leslie Bibb - Carley Bobby
  • Amy Adams - Susan
  • Houston Tumlin - Walker Bobby
  • Grayson Russell - Texas Ranger Bobby
  • Ted Manson - Chip
  • Jack McBrayer - Glenn
  • Greg Germann - Larry Dennit, Jr.

External Links [edit]

Wikipedia

  • Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby quotes at the Net Moving-picture show Database
  • Talladega Nights: The Carol of Ricky Bobby at Rotten Tomatoes
  • RickyBobby.com
  • RICKY BOBBY Facebook

villanuevafrompeat1957.blogspot.com

Source: https://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/Talladega_Nights:_The_Ballad_of_Ricky_Bobby

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